Glitter is not glitter. It has never been glitter. It is thousands of tiny, shimmering demons which grasp tight to all surfaces for fear of the winds of change. They are probably harmless.
if anyone ever calls you a slut just say ‘and yet i still won’t fuck you’ and then blow them a kiss as you saunter away because that’s the closest they’re ever gonna get to your magnificence, o smaug, chiefest and greatest of calamaties